Floccinaucinihilipilification

Empty preserve jar and buttered grain toast sacrifices morning appetite

I hear the daily political rhetoric resonate across the screens

Both on video as well as outside on the sidewalk of passing people

And yet even today I remain numb about most of the subjects

Rarely do I engage or take any sides of additional growing disharmony

As if I’ve been snake bitten intellectually and lean shyer

All this world learns from life is how to fight or profit for any reason

Having long forgotten those missing from our broken hearts

Making my palate for the sweeter things of life soured

And I question what more or purpose will become of my time left here

As grains of lost time are converted into manufactured solar panels

Surely, human intends to extend their colonial perversion into the whole universe

Trying to one-up one another or find satisfaction for an unquenchable thirst

It is truly my hope long before then… to ascend and miss all that mess

Silky petals

Could not the Odyssey spare me a Nightingale

Thereby offering me promising hope of warmth

Invite me to picture a rural sylvan of green tops

Colorful butterflies in flight and light hair girls

Chasing after without real intent to surrender

Oh, I could almost hear their echoing laughter

As I lay alone, reading somewhat sprawled out

Upon an inviting blanket where I offer them rest

Then, we would chat about the flowers and moon

And of course, love and lazy afternoons- all alone

Sisters or friends endeavoring to become women

And I- merely but lad desiring to become a man

Would only too happily feel obliged to them both

After all, what then is nature for if not to…bloom

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Missed

I stare easterly at a future dormant horizon that lays bare and ominous

That imaginary long thin line we notice cognitively in a pensive mind

Just as a northern breeze caresses my left cheek, invoking my childhood memories

Of when I stood offside of my mother, and she innately touched my face

As if saying without words, “Worry not about today my child, I am still here”

In that loving fashion only, mothers can do so affectionately without ridicule

When an impressionable lad’s head is filled with naive fleeting thoughts

Far removed from the dangers of life, love, and other immoral malice

But time and life lessons overcome a parental effort when absent

And children become near adults with all life’s answers all wrapped up

As if bequeathed divine knowledge like chosen future saints of a church

Reminding me in this sober moment, we’ve not enough time to learn

How to openly communicate and respect one another’s differences

Let alone grasp a fuller understanding of what love really… is

Risky

I whispered to you so many times

But I’m only just discovering now

You never heard a word from my heart

And I’m really unsure which is worse

Simply too slow to know or feeling ignored

Love for me requires I attempt it

Even if I fail in my messages

Something inside myself was attracted

To someone that doesn’t know I’ve existed

Like a shadow of a suppressed whisper

Waiting to be coaxed into loves light

I am all I ever been deep inside myself

But my heart wanted expansion

In the arms of someone… attentive

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Explication

There are just some things

We discover unexpectedly

That can summate so much

Speaking on behalf of our hearts

Or maybe our lingering thoughts

Morning was duller than normal

And coffee had infused the air

Something felt off, yet still right

So, I sat at the table in my chair

Staring out of the framed pane

I noticed a cloudy mist stalled

Directly over a meadow chasm

I thought to myself, how apropos

Mother has hung up…my portrait

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Impulsively

I experienced far too many things

In my younger days of romanticism

So much so, I thought myself adroit

To all the free samplings I’d tasted

As honey-sweet as they were for me

I rarely revealed their bitter departing

More pensive reflection may have seen

The fallacy in my premised knowledge

Observation has its special advantages

Just as first experiences behold their own

Truth be told- steeping is timely learnt

Where one savors the truest of flavors

Only now am I ready to gently simmer

Purity of love and life… with a lover

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Empty shell

Like waves that make it obvious

We never left things unsaid

And yet, here and now, and yet

I’m wadding through our past

Along today’s barren shores

Incompleteness is what I have

Like a child separated in a fog

No sense, no sense of direction

Just waves without messages

No light, no darkness, no friend

All of our footprints are absence

No breezes of lost whispers reminding

Just memories of our shared days

Filled with too many…things left say

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Clairity

I walked away from a narrative of lies

I had nothing to disprove- to anyone

Bloodletting is meant to demoralize

Indiscretions are measured in degrees

If sin comparison for everyone is equal

I’ve got further from being recognized

Because I refuse to deny my lived life

If I must, I’ll live alone inside my truths

And one-way conversations with old ghost

Empathy is an island they leave unfound

I breathe in its fresh air every single day

My scars will forever be part of me now

And I still bleed inside my heart’s dreams

Behind the fogginess of my true… reality

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Spent

I rose before a colorful dawn broke

Nothing could’ve felt sadder

And while in that silence, I lost hope

In the little bit left of each other

We’ve so desperately held on to

And no matter how much

Of my brokenness still loved you

It wouldn’t be perfect or enough- any more

To match what we’ve already lost

From all the hurtful lies and distrust

You’ve loved the idea of loving me back

As I loved you with my whole being

And I love you enough to let you go

From the last piece of myself… that still can

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Significance

Everything you love about me

It seems, you took with you

Truth be told, I really don’t mind

But at the same time- Babygirl

I’m feeling everything I love about you

Is missing from my heart too

The touch of love is distinct enough

To know as soon as it’s missing

And nothing fills voids like that

If they’re left behind in your soul

What used to feel full now feels empty

I’ve felt pain I never wanted to know

I never knew so many tears could pour

From a Father’s heart… and wounded soul

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