Empty shell

Like waves that make it obvious

We never left things unsaid

And yet, here and now, and yet

I’m wadding through our past

Along today’s barren shores

Incompleteness is what I have

Like a child separated in a fog

No sense, no sense of direction

Just waves without messages

No light, no darkness, no friend

All of our footprints are absence

No breezes of lost whispers reminding

Just memories of our shared days

Filled with too many…things left say

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Poet of the Light © 2023

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Clairity

I walked away from a narrative of lies

I had nothing to disprove- to anyone

Bloodletting is meant to demoralize

Indiscretions are measured in degrees

If sin comparison for everyone is equal   

I’ve got further from being recognized

Because I refuse to deny my lived life  

If I must, I’ll live alone inside my truths

And one-way conversations with old ghost       

Empathy is an island they leave unfound       

I breathe in its fresh air every single day      

My scars will forever be part of me now      

And I still bleed inside my heart’s dreams

Behind the fogginess of my true… reality

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Poet of the Light © 2023

Photo by Gabriela Palai on Pexels.com

Spent

I rose before a colorful dawn broke

Nothing could’ve felt sadder

And while in that silence, I lost hope

In the little bit left of each other

We’ve so desperately held on to

And no matter how much

Of my brokenness still loved you

It wouldn’t be perfect or enough- any more  

To match what we’ve already lost

From all the hurtful lies and distrust      

You’ve loved the idea of loving me back

As I loved you with my whole being    

And I love you enough to let you go

From the last piece of myself… that still can  

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Poet of the Light © 2023  

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Significance

Everything you love about me

It seems, you took with you

Truth be told, I really don’t mind

But at the same time- Babygirl

I’m feeling everything I love about you

Is missing from my heart too

The touch of love is distinct enough

To know as soon as it’s missing

And nothing fills voids like that

If they’re left behind in your soul      

What used to feel full now feels empty  

I’ve felt pain I never wanted to know

I never knew so many tears could pour

From a Father’s heart… and wounded soul

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Poet of the Light © 2022

Informal

Loss is always dressed as an ambush

Leaving you in shock and pain riddled

Or too numb to distinguish a difference  

It’s something you can never prepare for

Albeit you can still plan until you’re blue

Unexpectedness exceeds our expectations

No matter how many losses we suffer

Intellectually we’re designed to hit reset

Which in turn sets us up for the next one

And our emotions will be caught off guard           

Some are felt deeper, others in fewer tears  

But nonetheless, it will most certainly hurt

If not immediately then in perpetual spurts    

And liken our hurt love… lasting forever

.

Poet of the Light © 2022

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Battle tempered

Like a shadow of who I once was

I’ll walk along my empty shores

In the twilight hours of times before

Gathering empty shells of dreams

Left in the wake of ugly betrayals

That nearly drowned me repeatedly  

I’ve stepped past the ghost of my hurt

That plagued me for too many years

Through my heart still feel the scars

That still hungers for- a love unfound      

Where I can practice all, I’ve learned    

To feel the warmth of love in my arms

While I’m clutched in her guiding hands

Teaching me to trust love… once again

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Poet of the Light © 2022

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Unconventionally

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I’ve no real magnetic control

Over my heart’s love for someone

Nor should I, least it be perverted

I can accept it or pretend and deny it   

But inside my heart, it is what it is

A truth I’m consciously aware of

Love defies mortal rhyme or reasons

And yet, it will reasonably rhyme

Like a divine harmonious song

And we play as parts of its chords

To make it sublime to us and others

And my affinity for someone may

Last a day or a lifetime- far beyond

I’ve loved beautifully and…tragically

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Poet of the Light © 2022

Honestly

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When I- do love you  

I wade deep into our emotions  

I appreciate even the tiniest efforts  

I live my quirkiness unabashedly  

I adore all of yours admirably  

I let you be yourself as you are  

But should you throw me away 

My love will weather it regardless  

Only more hurt but at a distance   

I’m guilty to a fault that way  

Only pretentious love that reacts polemic  

Couldn’t have been love, to begin with  

Dynamics and degrees are different 

Like childishness versus… immaturity   

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Graveyard

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I wake up to a subdued twilight

Staring at me through the pane

My throat is dry and head hurts

I’m at a loss for any thoughts

As I shake off feeling overtired

I gathered myself up somewhat

Jacket and I slip into the streets

Blending into moving shadows  

Beneath the stars and emptiness         

I feel cold as hunger tugs on me          

Scent of snow lingers in the air       

I head for coffee at the open diner

Living a life story, I don’t want         

Trying to find my way…back out

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Poet of the Light © 2022

Unplanned things

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I wanna live in a big house 

That was made for visits  

Where wallpaper never changes  

And the ocean is steps away  

After an indulgent breakfast  

Where memories are made  

And linger for multi-generations 

Where long silent walks clear  

Cold dreary morning fogs  

And evenings are filled with fire 

That warm you to your soul  

Where you can get snowed in  

But never feel its stir crazy  

Where love is… in the air itself  

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Poet of the Light © 2022