Unbeknown

A single set of footprints

Blemish a dawns virginal snowfall

Right up to, where I sit alone

On an old frozen park bench

My front row, unadulterated view

Send chills like whispers, up my spine

Suddenly- You- catch my breath

You run through so childishly

A field, of tall whiskey colored grasses

Your arms out and heart pumping free

Eyes closed, uninfluenced courage

As if that wasn’t enough- to fall in love

A warm sun, kissing your silky skin

In every breath taken, love is being lived

Heavens grace, certainly so beautiful

And your leaving nothing

But your giggles as a footprint

At least here, this moment, silently

In the imaginary vivid scene

Playing out, in my mind

Loves life of a yesterday

When I’m gone from my reality

Where I walk around, dazzlingly

Wearing the face of foolish regret

As if it were an appropriate mask

Over mistakes- I never made

Lord knows, that’s what happens

When there are no reasons, no clues

Left behind from someone you loose

Oh, we both know the unknown truth

That causes me to weep inside

And weighing ever heavily on me

I never lost you- you just left

Like a midnight rain storm

As a trusting heart slept

But I can’t, can’t- get past it

Where time and I are trapped

Between my heart and mind

On an island of perfect memories

Surrounded by a minefield of glaciers

Needing answers, I’ll never get

To all those heartbroken questions

Why couldn’t you stay and love me

As you did- perfectly…in our yesterdays?

Whenever

I remember when

You first stole me, as a friend

I remember when

You stole my full attention

I remember when

You let me steal the first taste of your lips

I remember when

You stole the sun, with your eyes

I remember when

You stole the whispers, of the wind

I remember when

Your touch first moved, my soul

I remember when

You stole, this trusting heart of mine

And I remember when

You left all you stole, broken and behind

The way whitecaps break

The way echoes can haunt

The way lightning strikes

The way whirlwinds turn

The way a sunburn kisses

The way the stars, alight

The way your love- hurts

No matter whenever, I’ll always…remember

Bedlam

Like a sparrow uplifts

On seemingly nothings

I fell into your words

Deeper than you did mine

I took all of yours to heart

But they’ve become all lies

Still- I dangled on hope

Rubbing against the course

That didn’t materialize

And drowned in its truth

I will wait above the fray

Of all my lost, yesterdays

Believing someone can love me

With the courage to be…true

Wakes of whispers

I pensively look around me

Realizing, this is my destiny

But not where, I ought to be

How did I get so tossed- aside?

I try to look up to the sky

As if answers, would fall on cue

Far too bright- for me to see

I remain here even more confused

And yet, that river flows- on

To places I’ve never gone

And comes from, where I’d been

Maybe- we’ll meet up at the end

She was all my sunshine and rain

Never thought I’d be the current…she’d change

River run

Nowhere to go but where I’m laid

As if it was always meant this way

And I’ve only just woke to my fate

Standing on a bank I’ll never own

Dwelling on things never coming

Just to keep from thinking of you

If only- I could walk across

The mirror of my sky, I’d find

A place in the raw deep darkness

Where I could sit and cry- alone

It would sound like thunder

That no one else could hear

And I’d know- nothing but blue

Oh- I’m lost in your leftover love

And dreams we’ll never see

After you up and went away- silently

Not so much as a note or a fight

That might help to explain

What you’re thinking in- your mind

All your promises fell like rain drops

Covering my face with hurt and pain

With the likes of I’ve never experienced

As cold air currents rush over me

I feel like a river destined to be

Darkened, long, winding and…endless

La malédiction

I can’t get out or stay out- alone

Outside light leaks through crevasses

Creating a heavy sense of murkiness

Each drop within my cave, echoes

As if they alone mark passing time

My memories of her are resilient

Not even time ablates their faces

And their dark shadowy followers

Are my beset, and broken emotions

That wants to trust and love again

But like a ghost left blindly abandoned

Only to be coaxed to remain within

This is the torrents of a love- that lost

A chasm, where once a heart lived

This place of which there is no escape

Until my fiery heart is renewed…or quits

Abruptions

Drunken neon lights and cut throat skies

Repeated broken promise kind of life

Became my normalcy of subjectively

My disasters always seem to come

Out of no where, no ominous warning

Like hell bent wildfires with no end

And all I could do is hope I’d be taken

Just to hold hopes hand- it would all stop

Even if I was the collateral of devastation

Until- she- fell- like a Grace sent rain

Life can turn on a dime void of expectations

Her ebony eyes reveling unknown galaxies

As she quelled my damaged aching heart

Her soft words soothed my burning scars

Allowing me to think- somewhat, straight

I tasted life’s sweetness between breaths

And like a fool in love, I believed in ever-after

But cruelly nothing last forever, including- her

And through my bloodshot eyes of disbelief

Who knew that her loss of love would change

Only to feel more like unwanted icy drops

Lingering like fog in my torn memories

And I be back hoping to become a collateral stop

Belief, I’d never get another abrupting rain of…Grace

Precision

Halted in my tracks

A tear ran down my face

Until it fell free- to damp grass

Melting snow reveled a lifeless color

Much like a still painting pose

As it laid resting in silence

Atypical April snow shower

In early hours of predawn

Brought death instead of raindrops

That normally births forth, life

It really was, quite unexpected

Twas only a day earlier

When I was elated- symbolically

The prospect of spring flooded over

Sunshine filled the landscape

Inviting warmth was radiating

Without summertime kind of suffocating

Gentle breezes brushed over everything

Random chirps of birds, tweeted

A multi-colored butterfly appeared

As it pranced on currents of air

I became memorized in wonderment

My heart began to see things, differently

Memories elicited past conversations

And the perfect tone of her voice

Suddenly spoke, loud and clear

My eyes had closed by then

And somehow I became convinced

She had returned, in her promised way

Mysteriously and tangibly

Invoking to marry past and present

She became- a living message as evidence

Like a rainbow of life

For but only a single purpose…mine

Timeless

Only half-of me, dared to watch

As you too quickly walked

While I stumbled for words

You disappeared, into fading echoes

In my heart I- followed you, immediately

But my mind always knew

The unmistakable bitter truth

And I- lived in it’s silence

Unloved by- the one, I couldn’t keep

And when the sun reined

I never felt anything, new

Living in the shadows- of wanting to

Starting over will never exist

For those who’ve kept…their hearts wish

C’était

Those midnight hours

Have fallen fast asleep

Leaving me and the moon, alone

And she never talks but listens

As we fall through time

Much the way, we used to do

As your fingertips chased conjured images

Up and down the surface of my skin

Our entangled bodies sharing the same breaths

As your eyes gazed into the depths

Of my souls open windows

Oh how could I’ve known- or thought

You were anything less, than an angel

That up and left with a new dawn

I still haven’t seen yet

All of me, lost all of you

To say I’ve been damaged

Would be most misleading

Tattered and bruised

Feels like its been eons

This is my old new image

But truth is- I’m still breaking

Though the pain is lessened

Maybe because, I’m growing numb

Bit by bit where my heart once sat

Beholding thoughts and memories

And I only live light, in darkness

Within the silence of a bitter truth

Of our love…that once was

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