Victor’s

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(When you find the courage to forgive the world, you must also forgive yourself.)

Finally, after all this time

We are here, face to face in truth

Smiling at this opportunity

Look how far we traveled broken

Separated by unfair circumstances

Neither of us could control , but we tried

One of us was always- letting go

Trying to keep those battle scars whole

Trying to survive, trying to do right

And here we are now in triumph

There is nothing needing to deny- anymore

It is our time to reconnect as we once were

We have been waiting to live love

My mind and heart have overcome… reunited

Connectively

There is no way to reach you connectively

Though you have had a profound effect on me

And while I know it was not all our fault

I have still forgiven everything- anyway

You reside inside another realm

Someplace I cannot afford to be part of

Even though it breaks my heart- in two

It is ok, I love you from my soul- anyway

I had hoped so much more for both of us

There was so much more we could have been

But life and time can be cruel teachers

I will cherish all the good times we shared

In reflection of my eye, I see shadows of our past

You will always be my brother… anyway

Taxis

These sonnets akin to my leaves

Written words by a voice in me

Slowly I’ve resigned to let go

Of my untold stories, I know

Some are written by my pain

Some are written for a change

Some are written in my blood

Some are written just because

Some are written by my shame

Some are words I can’t explain

Some are written in my tears

Some took me many of years

Everything comes in due time

My soul… whispers their flight

Connectivenss

I know deep in my heart

She’ll be the one to come

As easy as a prismatic dawn

Delicate and precious

Like she’s always been

God’s perfect angel

She’ll heal me- in a breath

With her divine touch

Whispering love to my heart

As her grin makes all the difference

And heaven’s gates open up

As we stroll side by side, in step

Over the threshold of life

Daddy and daughter hand in hand…again

Love overcomes

I walked out before daylight

There was a chill- in the air

Step by step I thought to myself

What happens if no one cares?

Somewhere off in the distance

I swear I heard some whispers

I could see across the vast horizon

As the sun slowly inched near

But somewhere in the zephyrs

Were those drifting echoes of words

I thought it was rain but was only dew

Trying to collect my full attention

I stared up at the twinkling stars

Wonder a bit more in the dark

I never felt alone in all this time

But something deep inside me broke

As a tear raced down my cheek

I felt my soul inside- give a sigh

Brightness of the dawn overcame

Everything including my sight

There was no way I could see

But in all that ethereal brilliance

I felt a Holy presence- embrace me

And all my questions dissipated

It seemed to have lasted only a minute

I noticed most of the day had gone on by

I was confused as it left me far behind

I stood all that time- in the same place

And that light gently slipped away

Night had come into its silent space

Then- those echoes returned again

And I understood… what they meant

Reservedly

I do openly admit to selfishness

Not all my life has been so dark

Or series of misery after another

I’ve had my cherishable moments

In relationships, and successes

And because I so treasure them

I’ll rarely share them with others

They serve in part as beacons of hope

When all else seems to go wrong

They remind me of the possibilities

When I feel closed in by my walls

They are lifelines in human storms

That helps to maintain my sanity

They’ll be here… as comforting stars

Outro

What hurts me the most

Is when we both really know

You break me down, for no reason

And you leave me suffering

Broken inside of- what’s left of me

Until I grow numb again

Until I’m beside myself- wondering

Why I can’t stop loving you

Why I try over and over to touch you

Somewhere inside all, you believe

But I only cry because I know it’s worthless

To give up everything I need to be

And defeat those doubts you see on me

Reflecting off my desperate tears

Your ugliness left… on a face of love

Dynamically

Micro cues are very telling

However, there’s no telling

What they mean from person to person

Everything is just general in nature

Whereas nuances are conjecture

And people must invest real time

Before they can benefit from guesses

It’s still called getting to know someone

Learning the tones of their voices

Any reactionary mood changes

Quirky glances across a room

Longing stare into each other’s eyes

Juxtaposing hurt and joyful tears

When to care and when… to be quite

Stimulus

Occasionally when spring rains

Come to fall with heavy intensity

I feel drawn to rush out and splash

In the growing puddled landscape

Occasionally when summer suns

Melt away the nights and stars

I feel compelled to just laze about

Floating in pools of cooler waters

Occasionally as colorful leaves fall

To speckle the ground in crispiness

I feel obliged to create a massive pile

To childishly dive into its centeredness

Occasionally when winter snows fly

I’m readied… for its fires and quite

Peeks

Best laid plans are transitory

But sometimes I wish I could see

My future far enough to prepare

To readjust and remain on track

To know when to hold in place

When to walk away- ever silent

Know the best way to let it all go

Know who to trust with my heart

When to know when love is truth

There are empty-hearted people

Selling out love for any attention

But I ain’t one and will never be

I’ll see it through until the end

Even if in the end… it’s just me

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