Carried

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They don’t tell you how harsh

Losing someone loved, forever

Really can hurt your heart

Caught up in a sea of emotions

Through our unbroken connection

I still rise and fall so unexpected

Flashes of our moments come

Reflections on the face of my tears

As I lose the will of pretending

I can fake it alone until I make it

I’m learning I’m lying to myself here

As time only deepens, a hurting scar  

Still in the deepest depths of pain

You and I will always remain…alive  

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Poet of the Light © 2022

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Street cells

My motivation has slipped by

To a wayside, of wait and see

The world reflects how I seem

My whole universe has changed

Leaving me behind in shadows

Surrounded by walls I don’t know

None of which know my secrets

Nor any of my fears or lost dreams

Familiarity makes all the difference

Between us friends and or foes alike

They’re newer strangers in reality     

And I- an orphan, wade out- life   

I abhor hugs from showy strangers

And their utterance’s… of inanities

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Poet of the Light © 2022

Starless

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There are those of us, accustomed

When bright lights start burning out

We acclimate as best we’ve learned

But its never easy, to say the least

Still- our world gets a bit darker

But that in itself isn’t really new

We’ve been trough many of storms

Each of them left us scarred, somehow

The scars replaced our missing pieces    

Though we oft pretend to be the same

It’s easier when no one notices anything

Losing loved ones- our greatest values      

Not all brokenness is on the surface    

Eventually, we’ll be left… to darkness

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Poet of the Light © 2022

Graveyard

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I wake up to a subdued twilight

Staring at me through the pane

My throat is dry and head hurts

I’m at a loss for any thoughts

As I shake off feeling overtired

I gathered myself up somewhat

Jacket and I slip into the streets

Blending into moving shadows  

Beneath the stars and emptiness         

I feel cold as hunger tugs on me          

Scent of snow lingers in the air       

I head for coffee at the open diner

Living a life story, I don’t want         

Trying to find my way…back out

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Poet of the Light © 2022

Unplanned things

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I wanna live in a big house 

That was made for visits  

Where wallpaper never changes  

And the ocean is steps away  

After an indulgent breakfast  

Where memories are made  

And linger for multi-generations 

Where long silent walks clear  

Cold dreary morning fogs  

And evenings are filled with fire 

That warm you to your soul  

Where you can get snowed in  

But never feel its stir crazy  

Where love is… in the air itself  

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Afterthoughts

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I rush to get myself nowhere  

Feeling like I’m always late 

I feel my life missing things  

As I sit around in the silence 

Waiting on a colorful dawn 

How else will I know to rest?  

Sleeping tires me these days  

I can’t shake feeling strange  

Did I miss too many steps,  

Or a road to the right bridge,  

Getting me to this lost space?  

I don’t really know anymore  

I used to think I knew enough  

That’s the nature of …lost loves

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Mutated sunsets

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Today the morning is laced  

In a bittersweetness of grays 

Its soberness can be tasted  

On the fringes of realization  

Some things are better left unsaid  

So, I will take my unspoken with  

As I pack up fragments of yesterday’s  

And my tidbits hope of tomorrow’s  

With broken promises and uncertainty  

As I leave behind what is left of family  

That could never fathom the depths  

Of my perpetual love for them  

I will nestle into a distant mountainside  

To observe life slowly …slip from sight  

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Holding out

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Alone at times, I close my eyes 

I just sit here in borrowed silence  

As I listen attentively for your whispers 

With tears streaming from my eyes  

As I anticipate what you might say 

My lawless heart beats thunderously 

It may seem a cruel thing to be doing 

But it secretly gives me more hope  

The way my prayers often do too  

Because even my love still hurts in truth  

So, what more is there I can say  

I will never compartmentalize you  

To love unconditionally from your soul 

You bear through it all… and never let go  

.

Poet of the Light © 2022  

Subtlety

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Made memories and the living  

The way photographs feel in the hand 

Compared to what we can envision 

For me, it was always the difference 

And something that really mattered   

I knew that I would always understand  

No matter what else ever happened  

But this just isn’t- the same for me now 

And those confusion changes daily  

Like the changing winds on barren lands  

Leaving me to feel foreign in understanding   

And I’ve gotten lost inside of what was  

That I can’t imagine even being found  

Or if I really ever want… to come back out

Poet of the Light © 2022  

Sentient

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I was born bruised and broken  

Heading downhill fast  

Trying to survive life’s avalanche  

Lord knows I wasn’t given a chance  

Still here I am- subsisting this  

In the shadows and light cast  

Like some monstrous outcast   

When all I’ve done was be born  

And even then, I was never asked  

But somehow, I have to pay the tax     

When does life change into living it,  

As in dreams, movies … or delusions? 

.

Poet of the Light © 2022