Trifling

Have you ever uttered silent prayers

while sitting on a pew somewhere- crying;

and wanting- to be taken far, far away

from everything that hurts, inside?

Invisible- terribly invisible

Oh I feel, so invisible

in every breath- I breathe

Have you ever felt the loneliest

amongst a crowed room that never listens;

when you’re trying to reach someone

long enough- to matter for a moment?

invisible- terribly invisible

Oh I feel, so invisible

in every breath- I breathe

Have you ever felt the rush of emotions

course from your soul- for no apparent reasons?

Have you ever felt like a forgotten memory,

someone left along their abandoned periphery?

Invisible- terribly invisible

Oh I feel, so invisible

in every breathe I breathe

Have you ever chased after your dreams

only to have them shattered crudely?

And then turn to someone you loved,

for comfort- but they only added to your misery?

Invisible- terribly invisible

Oh my God- I feel so invisible

in everything I do and…I- am

Double bind

I can feel the haunting breeze

Drift ghostly over my naked skin

Just like your teasing presence

Was asleep as you innocently breathed

Why- why can’t I just stop this?

If my emotions can’t be tamed

To quell incessant storms of rain

Or welcome in the morning sun

Knowing the moon just escaped

Under the wild silk of darkness

Then I don’t want these memories

If they can’t be lovingly erased

From the heartfelt touch of another

That makes me feel so unique

I’m positively sure, there is no other

I can’t afford another broken lover

That could believe, I’m replaceable

Oh please! don’t let me smell the scent

Of a some promising love, ever again

Not unless- I fall into heaven with you

Don’t let me be human anymore

If this is going to be the price I’ll pay

For trusting blindly in heartbeat ways

I’d rather be a statue lost forever to an ocean

At least then, I’ll only fall so deeply …once

Seconds

To be free and deeply in love

With someone that only comes once

Is like living heaven here on earth

Until it ends, until it hurts- endlessly

Running wild through the fields

I still remember how real it feels

Beneath that August morning sun

If only in my day dreams, again

I sit here staring off in clouded space

As if I know in some way, some day

My soul will soon get the chance

To chase after you yet again, girl

I pray with each passing second afforded me

You’ll be the one to take me home to…eternity

Whirlwind

Yesterday I knew of:

The flavor of your wet lips

Warmth of their nakedness

Pressed lustrously against mine

Delicacy of your fingers

As they traversed my entity

Exposing all secrets of my mind

The seductive caress of your breath

As it toyed with my skin and imagination

Subjugating my senses- mindlessly

The scent our your perfume

Freshly laced with both our sweat

Heightening our erotic simulations

Verbalized tones of your achieved pleasure

Tethering of my name when its spoken

and your uncensored exclamatory phrases

The welcomed pain of your grasping nails

As they tore deep into my salty flesh

Contracting like a boa with all your energy

The rhythm of your heart when at rest

Fashionable clutch of your hand with mine

Placement of all your sleepy self in my arms

And today, again I failed to capitulate,

My suffrage, from your loss as…your casualty

Too indicative

Everyday seems like the last one

Every hour more boring, disappointing

Sometimes I burst out in laughter

When I’m dreaming of you, night or day

Still here loving me, like you did

Have you ever dared to- remember?

These foolish waves of water rush in

Only to reflect me too often, too real

Where true sadness is carved on my face

I’m feeling lost inside myself, still- missing

I’ve got more than a million questions

But I don’t need all them answered

I just need to know your listening

To these feelings; whispers of my heart

Are you even out there…somewhere?

Why should I even wonder or care anymore?

I start a million one-sided conversations

Replaying how you might answer, or

Have you forgotten me the way,

I can’t forget you or your touches?

All you seem to have left behind with me

Is to be- beset by what dwells within

An unbridled passion of love- rejected

To breathe, be freed and be possessed

Beyond these haunting memories…of- us

Fare thee well

Last I knew twas most promising

Until I turned my back from view

Some count time like diamonds

Time lapsed like a candle flame

Extinguishing in every second

Now, cawing of a nearby crows

Expecting to devouring my soul

Before I woke their humiliation

As breath of life resumes again

In and out my own shallow- gasps

Purge outwardly from a salty man

A wet sandy bed lays beneath me

Like carrion left to the mercy

Of a bitter and thrashing wave

Murder thought hope to claim

I was tossed aside loves boat

And left to drown in the dark

Nowhere was a shore in sight

Just I- reaching for a moon beam

As if it were some sorta life line

At least before reality vacated

And some passing star saved me

Miraculously dredging me from a sea

Reality now finds me…loves castaway

Static fool

Happened all in a moment

Frozen deep within oneself

I felt it all, and all in an instant

It was an unspoken narrative

Surrounding me in a dark- colorless

All this time

I’ve been walking in a fog

All this time

My heart has been hoping for

Coalesce; you coming back home

To loves universe colorful, breathtaking

To my heart where you belong

To my arms giving me your warmth

All this time- girl, I’ve been waiting

All this time to live love again…with you

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