Afterthoughts

I rush to get myself nowhere

Feeling like I’m always late

I feel my life missing things

As I sit around in the silence

Waiting on a colorful dawn

How else will I know to rest?

Sleeping tires me these days

I can’t shake feeling strange

Did I miss too many steps,

Or a road to the right bridge,

Getting me to this lost space?

I don’t really know anymore

I used to think I knew enough

That’s the nature of …lost loves

Unfolding realities

Narcissists are naturally cunning

Even factoring in being forgiven

Into the fabric of nefarious plans

And before enacting their deeds

Upon those, they will victimize

We should oblige them- just once

Proving to ourselves that we can

But void of any remorseful actions

We must avoid becoming complicit

By letting them convict themselves

Next time they trespass boundaries

As they utter forgiveness platitudes

We end all our further interactions

Because narcissists…evade change

Careless flickers

My love was like some fervor

Something inside me took over

But I didn’t care, and I let go

When I fell in love with you

It was all fun at first

It was the best I ever had

It was a fire that loved to hurt

It was quickly burning me alive

Romance has a way of dying

Like a slow-burning ember

Sometimes it takes days to subside

But others may smolder forever

Now I’m the tainted smoke

That drifts in the wind… alone

Risen

I twas but as fictional as

Any other from my birth

Who acquiesced to my life

In what little I deciphered

Till finding my true nature

Hidden deep within myself

Raw, vulnerable, and naive

Same way we’re all created

Emotional and intellectual

Uncouth and soulfully naked

Unknown and undamaged

Only to be bent and broken

We’re dammed and innocent

We are faithful… and forgiven

Ripple effects

Oh, tragedies I could have spun

Into likeness of silk and then sold

Like some underground merchant

Just so I could afford myself more

Of that circle of pass me around

On the corporate merry go round

As if a few tokens could suffice

The unwanted begotten legacy of

Scars of accompanying bitterness

That never lets anyone- sleep well

Learning you’re- your own ghost

And romantic scenes of sailing off

On open ocean waters are diluted

In fogyish daily life of… forgottenness

Polar

It’s like sleeping all day and night

When you wake you don’t know

If night is hanging or if it’s twilight

But something is right about

Something being all wrong

And you just can’t put my finger on

What is or isn’t really going on

Deep down you’ve gone wild

I still believed we had half a chance

But deep down inside myself

I don’t know why you’ve changed

Or say the cruel things- you do

You linger deep inside my mind

But you keep breaking… my heart

Not guilty

I used to argue with my other self

That self that never believed in me

Always interfering in everything

Making my life completely chaotic

And always dragging me down

But that self is no longer around

Now- I’m not saying it was murder

But I’d call it more like self-defense

It’s not my fault, I wasn’t myself

That self was just making me crazy

I went back to check out the scene

When I got there, there was no body

Besides no evidence of any crime

I’d just claim…temporary insanity

Hertogeneity

Photo by Rodolfo Quiru00f3s on Pexels.com

I may have been the next Holden Caulfield

But life intervened in a charitable fashion

That’s not to say that I hadn’t been affected

By things I experienced, witnessed, or lived

Clearly, I’d be one of the first to fully admit

People let you down, though it’s uncertain

If each time it was intentionally motivated

I error on the side of caution, to believe not

If I am truly the product of my environment

Who is it by name, to fault, to seek recompense?

What would any of that gain me now, so late;

A dying flower will still wilt away, will it not?

Rather than become an imaginary inky character

I became the outcome of myself… in real life

Bullies

PAMPLONA, SPAIN – JULY 11: (Photo by Denis Doyle/Getty Images)

I honestly replayed our actions

Failing to understand all of this

Then thought I might write you

But to what avail would follow

When we’ll both remain at odds

As further and deeper wounds

Will ensue our bruised hearts

We’re clearly beset by our logic

However emotionally coincided

Insensitive ears never do listen

Just as blind eyes fail at reading

There’s no middle road to be found

When you’d prefer to run over me

Cynics shouldn’t drive… anything

Waywardness

I’ve traveled so far, so long

Amongst palisades of darkness

Left unseen by my blindness

My boots muddied and rent

Too heavy until discarded

Freshness became unveiled

Now- it is here- before me

A pathway for my bare feet

My footprints fit it perfect

Each step lighter than the last

The forest became enchanting

Warmth of the risen sun radiates

Whispers of breezes on my face

I’m safe- in my way…to home

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this: