Begotten

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I was made like a rouge snowflake

Beneath the silence of a grey skyway

Drifting further on faint amber sun rays

Slowly falling- like love naturally does

I’ve been to hear and there and back

But too often I always got sidetracked

And all I ever was yet remains lost

Along the meandering way, I came

Just as if it was laid in place, for me

Where I am now, I’ve never been before

But sometimes I want to go backward

To someplace warm, worn, and familiar

I was created out of your heart’s dream

I was born from your tear… into light

The unrest

Like a surprising fall from a ship

Then grasping at straws in prayers

As we tread the onslaught of waves

Churning the undertow of currents

Only to wash upon stranger shores

Once safe, disappointment sets in

Finding I’m beset to where I am

Reluctant acclimation hovers over

As I watch daily suns rise then fall

But I’m not sensing an inherent life

Here, where I currently do reside

And yet I see no other viable offer

But I feel this calling deep within

That only comes from…one’s home

Unorthodoxy

It was as if my soul separated

And without leaving me behind

Or so my emotions still imagine

Yet, that’s where I am, just- left

Left to remember our shared times

Left to wonder of my tomorrows

That I will likely not really notice

Not like I should, or once used to

In the undertones of my own breaths

My thoughts will be tethered to you

Wondering about your thoughts now

Of me, life, and your new everlasting

You brought life to my lost soul

But now- my life feels… so soulless

Bittersweetness

There is something to be said

For those surprising select flavors

Of yesterdays we still remember

As if they were a homemade stew

I’ve long missed the ages of mail

Piling upon a still cold foyer floor

Mostly a clutter of obsolete news

Liken fallen leaves in midst of fall

That time and winds have chased

Indicating someone is still gone

As life kept coming to their door

The way tumbleweeds stumble by

Now, the only chasing is by whispers

Lost in silence of our…unfished conversations

Cast

When I was much younger

I surrendered like a feather to wind

I remained quiet and afraid

Like a shadow is with light

Until love swept me away

As if I was a worthy whisper

And quashed surrounding darkness

Dispelling all my inner fears

And invoking my own courage

Blessing me with loves happiness

I would have otherwise not known

Until time itself swept away love

And like that feather, I befell

Returning me to…my erstwhile self

Inducement

As a blue-eyed young lad

I believed in youthful stories

They were lifelines to my soul

Beyond the mere metaphoric

So- I followed a yellow brick road

Only to discover it was pyrite

Breaking my will’s inner spirit

So- I sought out true love instead

And found a brown-eyed girl

That broke up my poor heart

Leaving me lost and alone

When you love from the soul

We become beset to those we love

Even if they love us… not

Paradoxical echoes

The loss of one’s own child

Is to truly lose part of oneself

Unlike some mere appendage

That grief is a different sort of pain

Life is too impotent to prepare us for

And that pain resonates deep within

A sacred place only love can know

I’d dare say- love realizes, it’s damaged

It’s a wound of yours without a scar

Unseeable, to indicate some healing

Evermore timeless and unrecoverable

Despite a plethora of touted platitudes

When meaningful love is unconditional

So too remains its unconditional…injury

Captures

Photo by Tobias Bju00f8rkli on Pexels.com

Silence is so bittersweet- anymore

It’s like a winter scene life painted

Hung up for all to see and admire

But the problem is, it never changes

Cold chills come as memories breeze in

Catching me totally off guard like a fog

Pretty soon I get lost inside them all

Feeling like I’m the only one, looking out

At everything moving on- without me

I’m just left in a world of my own

You used to keep these things from coming

When my simple life still had meaning

But all that and I suddenly froze still

Leaving your last breath… in my chills

Dynamics

I sense her silent audience now and then

Like the manner, one senses a shadow

Ever present, yet resolved to its elusiveness

Especial when I’m set away to myself

Where I meander betwixt life and memories

My inner dams hold back sorrow, mostly

Still, I’m innately beset to always wonder

What she might say to me today or tomorrow

That’s the thing about silence and solitude

You tend to steep in the surrounding silence

Today was better than my last lot of them

However not as great as my best days gone

I also wonder if I ever lived up to the image

She saw me as, cause I’ve always… intended to

Untimely

I don’t know where to begin

But that’s nothing new- anymore

Something internal happens

And I get caught in a lull

Suddenly all my emotions break out

I can’t hold them back or down

I’m back to feeling your loss

Just as painfully fresh as it ever was

My heart and time both get so lost

Until I can pretend once again

You’re holding me close in your arms

And I feel the rhythm of your heart

Slowly consoling all my falling tears

As if you’re here… my eyes tightly shut

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