Carried

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They don’t tell you how harsh

Losing someone loved, forever

Really can hurt your heart

Caught up in a sea of emotions

Through our unbroken connection

I still rise and fall so unexpected

Flashes of our moments come

Reflections on the face of my tears

As I lose the will of pretending

I can fake it alone until I make it

I’m learning I’m lying to myself here

As time only deepens, a hurting scar  

Still in the deepest depths of pain

You and I will always remain…alive  

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Poet of the Light © 2022

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Porosity

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Out of sorts, so to speak 

Inside, the outside of myself  

Listening to a distant train 

As it slowly makes its way  

Through snowy mountains 

Until it gets lost in cold silence 

And deep sleeping echoes  

The way secrets drift away  

Into those forgotten places  

Where beloved memories stay safe  

Oh! if only I were a winter season  

It seems love stays that secret 

I still haven’t learned  

Well enough to…hold on to  

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Honestly

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When I- do love you  

I wade deep into our emotions  

I appreciate even the tiniest efforts  

I live my quirkiness unabashedly  

I adore all of yours admirably  

I let you be yourself as you are  

But should you throw me away 

My love will weather it regardless  

Only more hurt but at a distance   

I’m guilty to a fault that way  

Only pretentious love that reacts polemic  

Couldn’t have been love, to begin with  

Dynamics and degrees are different 

Like childishness versus… immaturity   

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Exhaling

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Almost nowhere left to go to 

Except into the truth of you  

Nothing left inside to hide  

Nothing more to set aside  

Time is slowly running out  

I’m too tired to chase down lies  

Or drown in doubting pools 

I’ll leave it for you- to sort out  

Just want to watch dawns rise  

And settle down for the nights  

Feel the breezes on my cheeks  

Hear mellifluous whispers of life  

In a way, only love can…speak  

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Afterthoughts

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I rush to get myself nowhere  

Feeling like I’m always late 

I feel my life missing things  

As I sit around in the silence 

Waiting on a colorful dawn 

How else will I know to rest?  

Sleeping tires me these days  

I can’t shake feeling strange  

Did I miss too many steps,  

Or a road to the right bridge,  

Getting me to this lost space?  

I don’t really know anymore  

I used to think I knew enough  

That’s the nature of …lost loves

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Holding out

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Alone at times, I close my eyes 

I just sit here in borrowed silence  

As I listen attentively for your whispers 

With tears streaming from my eyes  

As I anticipate what you might say 

My lawless heart beats thunderously 

It may seem a cruel thing to be doing 

But it secretly gives me more hope  

The way my prayers often do too  

Because even my love still hurts in truth  

So, what more is there I can say  

I will never compartmentalize you  

To love unconditionally from your soul 

You bear through it all… and never let go  

.

Poet of the Light © 2022  

Broad strokes

The morning is cold and gray   

Feels like winter is on its way  

Spring and summer are memories  

And there’s a hollowness inside 

Echoing back things about my life 

I’m missing chances I let slip away  

These echoes are reminding me  

Not to waste another fragile day  

Yet I still don’t know what to do 

But chase after rainbows I can’t see  

Slaying windmills found in my way  

Looking for where I truly belong  

Scarred, tired, and barely hanging on  

I’m a man you’d have to love… blindly  

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Alacrity

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Nothing about love is negative 

Those platitudes are merely myths 

To get you to capitulate yourself 

To neurotic whims of someone else 

Those who have needs to manipulate   

Love is a gift they can’t appreciate  

Love flows in abundance naturally   

Around the bends and sprawls out 

It churns in-depth and even falls  

Out of nowhere in faraway places  

It is fierce and gentle all at once     

Silky and soothing with its touch      

Love ushers out no waves of regret  

Love is the exception… in everything 

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Poet of the Light © 2022  

Unfolding realities

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Narcissists are naturally cunning  

Even factoring in being forgiven 

Into the fabric of nefarious plans 

And before enacting their deeds  

Upon those, they will victimize  

We should oblige them- just once 

Proving to ourselves that we can  

But void of any remorseful actions 

We must avoid becoming complicit  

By letting them convict themselves  

Next time they trespass boundaries   

As they utter forgiveness platitudes  

We end all our further interactions 

Because narcissists…evade change  

Poet of the Light © 2022  

Careless flickers

My love was like some fervor 

Something inside me took over  

But I didn’t care, and I let go 

When I fell in love with you 

It was all fun at first  

It was the best I ever had 

It was a fire that loved to hurt  

It was quickly burning me alive  

Romance has a way of dying  

Like a slow-burning ember  

Sometimes it takes days to subside  

But others may smolder forever  

Now I’m the tainted smoke  

That drifts in the wind… alone   

. 

Poet of the Light © 2022