Dearest

I imagine you, even in your ghostly state hidden from my view

Trying to catch my falling tears in your palm as time pitters onward

And I burn away like a candle in my lone silence

Still struggling as to why I can’t answer many unknowable things

That plague me with questions whenever my scars bleed from my memories

That I’ll never let go of, despite all the pain to preserve them

Not a day passes that doesn’t humble me further from my older self

Not a day passes I don’t hurt still from you missing from my life

Not a night has the sobering cold left me alone

Not a night that I don’t secretly fear the next day to come

Oh, time- time has become a cruel warden for me

Most notable in ever spent second, lost minute, and passed hour alike

Did you catch those in your palms child that just fell away as I stared out a dark window?

When will the Father let me know the answers… to my heartfelt questions?

Ecliptic

Despite the greatest of heavenly intentions in a galaxy of wills

Your trajectory glanced off a rogue shooting star

Causing you to skip past where we were both destined

Leaving us stranded from our true fate as lovers

Still, you and I separately walk along the fringes of bodied waters

While on opposite sides of a shared moon’s reflection

Where our lone heart softly whispers our prayers

For all, we still need as tears from our eyes fall through gaps of silence

Into swirling aired winds to soar in search of deliverance

We reflect like lone abstract flowers in fogyish clouds of water

Convinced we feel the existence of our shared synced hearts

Reverberating perfectly along in rhythm with our missed destiny

But even if eons pass from heaven’s eternal time

You and I- will still find one another united… one day

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Polemic

You and I- are like the naturally occurring equinox

Try as we might by our desire to mesh as the unmistakable equals we are

Would foolishly lead us into a sacrificial implosion

Having only metrically irritated one another from our efforts

You’ll follow your innateness to the end of time

As I follow the reflections of heavenly mirrors with mine

Only one of us could ever serve in the sun

While the other hovers as the face of the moon

We’re designed to harmoniously balance darkness and light

However, only if neither of us chases or lays claims as the other’s shadow

Our desire is meant to serve throughout our passionate fate

That motivates all we will ever become, as individual codependents

We’re constricted by our existence for a grand function

Poetically bound together in everything … but love

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Aesthetical

You’re afforded to adjudicate me in whatever fashion you desire

Albeit this typically occurs when others measure me by their philosophy

And one most often that I’ve not subscribed to nor chosen to accept

But its o k really, we can all learn from even mistaken fallacies

Cynics in our life are dark clouds that pass over and inconveniently rain on us

Per usual just when we’ve made some earnest progress in our life garden

While narcissists in our lives are like dark nights that linger in morning’s after

They not only stole all the blankets but every ounce of our lit morning sun

The world fruits with great wonders but it also has far too many noxious weeds

Crowding in personal cracks and spaces with platitudes of “self-serve first”

Contaminating or influencing life connections of any susceptible environment

We’re at mercy to where we establish our roots in hopes to thrive in our purpose

Some of us will become roses, or weeping willows while others dry out and die

Whatever it is I attain to, I pray what I leave behind… flourishes as beautiful

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Dyads

I recognize there are those that abhor when their emotion get disturbed

And dislike any pictures or evoking talks of the realities of death and or war

Or of the collateral damage that lingers behind like a tainted legacy

While those of us who have lost loved ones are left to live our broken actualities

We’ll light candles in remembrance or write letters never to be sent

We’ll speak openly of our enduring pain and hollowness within our presence

While overly burdened with a love for them with nowhere to gift it

We’ll absorb as best we can by compelling ignorant glances given towards us

We’ll surrender a life we once had, having no other choice in the matter

We’ll identify others like us, in our walks, fashion, or perhaps blank stares

We are not alone, yet lonely for the response from those missing

But the greatest cause of our daily loneliness comes from those still living

Those we love like those we lost, but we’re avoided like a plague

Resolved not to surrender, forget and move on as if… they’ve never existed

Ensuing

They told me my grief would get easier with passage of time

But all it has become is an unending swan song

As the DB majors and C minors cut through all of those lies

Leaving stripes of tear stains upon my cheeks

And my life, much like my broken heart feeling empty

I’m sure a part of them meant well but honesty played no part

Making my world even smaller than I once thought

Still, I wash my face, stand up straight in your memory

But I’m fully sure you know all too well, I’m just pretending

You’ve been the soul of my heart since the moment of your birth

That pivotal moment when the universe changed forever

I had no idea your absence would cause the universe to retract

All of life’s goodness that your presence depicted

Leaving me beset within this slow-motion… heart attack

Floccinaucinihilipilification

Empty preserve jar and buttered grain toast sacrifices morning appetite

I hear the daily political rhetoric resonate across the screens

Both on video as well as outside on the sidewalk of passing people

And yet even today I remain numb about most of the subjects

Rarely do I engage or take any sides of additional growing disharmony

As if I’ve been snake bitten intellectually and lean shyer

All this world learns from life is how to fight or profit for any reason

Having long forgotten those missing from our broken hearts

Making my palate for the sweeter things of life soured

And I question what more or purpose will become of my time left here

As grains of lost time are converted into manufactured solar panels

Surely, human intends to extend their colonial perversion into the whole universe

Trying to one-up one another or find satisfaction for an unquenchable thirst

It is truly my hope long before then… to ascend and miss all that mess

Silky petals

Could not the Odyssey spare me a Nightingale

Thereby offering me promising hope of warmth

Invite me to picture a rural sylvan of green tops

Colorful butterflies in flight and light hair girls

Chasing after without real intent to surrender

Oh, I could almost hear their echoing laughter

As I lay alone, reading somewhat sprawled out

Upon an inviting blanket where I offer them rest

Then, we would chat about the flowers and moon

And of course, love and lazy afternoons- all alone

Sisters or friends endeavoring to become women

And I- merely but lad desiring to become a man

Would only too happily feel obliged to them both

After all, what then is nature for if not to…bloom

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Necesitty

I’ve read that our journey is our mission of purpose

But I’m unsure others would be so easily convinced of that

Some may argue its unknowable; how cynical to avoid a stance

It is strange how truth and fiction interchange with the winds

One minute, it and the sun are at your back, in the next vice versa

But for the life of me, I’m unsure which we catch most often or why

I’ve left myself available and open-minded enough for listening

I can be astute to facts and remain fully attentive

Yet, I saw nor heard from anyone that claims otherwise

I’m a simple man steeped in a resolve of living by my beliefs

None of which I can claim is absolute, but it fits me well

Like the winds, I’ve often changed directions in my life’s venture

Some missions require you to remain… right where you are

Enroute

Casting mere simple velleities aside

I’ve peregrinated landscapes of love

Along my way, I’ve paid heavy tolls

I still wear those scars on my heart

As I dared not to give up and let go

Of a love that left me malnourished

After abandoning my heart and soul

My attenuated mind trust as a child

Albeit love remains my Achilles heel

Love liken a flower survives off hope

And sooner or later true love blooms

In places, no one would’ve thought so

Times grains have been lost to winds

Yet, I endeavor as a … divine sonnet

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