Maintenance-free

I resign that, I was created a certain way

For a certain set of unknown reasons

Till my skills are required in their moments

Which are often performed as impromptu

Like a refined humanized, self-fine tuner

Albeit, they’ve have aided my triumphs

However, they’ve also aided in my downfalls

I’m sure in my biased mind, I’d like to think

In some divine math it simply balances me

In a quaint fashion … I’ll never understand

Involuntary

There’s this distinctive residue

That clings to me, unceasingly

And I suspect it’s some sort of

Derivative of our broken love

Bits of you that seems to remain

Filling, if you will, damaged space

Where bits of myself once reined

Which then explains this emptiness

I feel in my being in each moment

Where once there was none noted

Teaching me, that- just perhaps

We’d fared better had there been

No love shared between our hearts

That’s made the both of us… lessor

Betwixt

It’s like a draught of some odd type

Here I am, still trying, trying to swim

In puddles of shallow waters, I’ve left

Getting nowhere fast, in thick muck

Those bitter waters are draining away

Leaving me a wreck in all my todays

And all of my fresh hopes I still have

Are draining away too, into their last

Did I miss my course along the way?

Or was a curse exactly where I headed

Steering blind into a charted storms eye

Believing I ‘ve founded my own island

I never really wanted to be a lost Pirate

Just a pilot for my hearts… lasting heaven

Paradoxically

Baby we really, really tried

Tried to hide lies in our eyes

We were both feeling inside

But our hearts were too wise

And saw through the disguise

We came to realize, it was time

Time to go our separate ways

Like seasons people can changed

Now each day I feel a little colder

Spring became a long shadow winter

How I miss more the flowery scents

You wore daily on your bare skin

I can’t help but wonder- secretly

If you’re happier now… without me?

Acuteness

New Mexico dust storm drives a tumbleweed

The wind seemed to change today

I abhor when that happens

“Out of the blue” unexpectedly

Everything feels out of sync

The light, the sound and- me

Like a fog that fell from the clouds

And then surrounds life itself

Until it settles and normalizes

Some fear its time catching up

Naw- that’s a flawed construct

Some things are simply lost forever

“Love, time” surely are two of them

No- it’s a sense of real strangeness

And that event may well be … us

Marginalized

Letting go is worth the fall

It was not ever my loneliness

That plagued my life so much

It was the falsehoods I was fed

Often it felt like I was falling

In a perpetual emotional fall

Grasping for one honest chance

To be heard, to be felt and seen

To be understood and believed

As nothing more but all- I am

The reason it felt like such a void

Is because, it was that one place

Inside myself that was left out

I found me, hidden behind… doubt

Fallout

Some of us love long downpours

That’ve dared to secretly sneak in

Beneath the humidly of daylight

Like warriors out on some mission

Saving what’s been wrongly taken

But I abhor their feckless endings

Qualm appears in queer ways

It is most strange, I’ll dare say

For me to sojourn for simplicity

That niche- where I’ve long to be

Within the worse of microcosms

Some of us bare out these lessons

Quietness really isn’t always

That peaceful sound thought

To bring one’s harmony back

That invisible sense of balance

Some of us have acutely learned

To recognized that unique “lull”

Of silence- right after a storm

Because we know what follows

Which is why, for some of us

The echoes are truly far worse

Then the origin … dares to be

Prophets’ dilemma

We collided like shooting stars

Streaking across the whole universe

But our passion became our poison

Weaponizing everything in our hearts

Filled in doubt and wrought suspicion

All the scaring became the easiest part

We slowly ran away from one another

Afraid of who we weren’t- becoming

Looking to claim who we never were

And we pretended not to notice, much

Until- we knew we were already gone

We turned our flames into a dark ice-age

Slipping past eternities edge of recovery

What have we done- to ourselves… to our love?

Boundless


Oh! how easy it has come for me
Almost like second nature, taking first
To beat emotions with wordy cudgels 
Mentally, senselessly again and again
As if- that individual was a virgin drum
In desperate need of renewed breaking in 
And heightening even more all this mess 
Intoxicating pain served, as my new love 
It’s so much quicker to just hurt myself 
Let me save you from the duty of scaring 
My whole identity and inner self-worth  
Saving you from the burden of … your love 

Poet of the Light © 2021

Barrowed

 

Oblivious to nature of the galaxy 
How it toils on without permission
However, we do notice of its presents 
When that infamous tolled bell rings 
If- I hear echoes of the bell tolled 
I know, twas not for I- not this time 
Yet- and none the less I am lessened 
Of whom it tolled in reconciliation
To notably lose an unmet friend 
In a most eerie but secretive silence 
That often can have a chilling effect
I should relax; loosen my tense cringe 
Recollect my lost train of thought, as if
Nothing at all happened… when it did  

.
Poet of the Light © 2021 

Re: Ernest Hemmingway
For whom the bell tolls~

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