Brainless

Did I look like a scarecrow

Whispers and wishes like cobwebs in my head

Who would’ve known, until it was far too late

After letting down my walls

After letting you get too close

Somehow, I know I should’ve known

I should’ve recognized the shadow

Standing on my own- darkness

I trusted, everything once again

Like the fool, I’ve always been

Whenever it came- to finding love

But finding I can still get broken

Who could’ve known

You had a hybrid heart… of deception

Dismantlement

The atmosphere felt very eerie

As I felt a shadow of suffrage

Her fixed eyes spoke in volumes

Long before her lips ever could

Stalling in face of uncertainty

My heart is compelled to listen

During the eruption of emotions

All facade of my reality crumbles

Even within the ugliest of truths

Whilst my heart is being broken

My world slows to a standstill

Despite turbulent echoes of chaos

Or unrelenting looming questions

I longed most for…her dark whispers

Unreconciled

I have overspent on love

With too much of myself

And now there’s nearly nothing left

I stare out my bedroom window

Up the stairs on the second floor

Watching the landscape changing

As frosted windowpanes weep

Warm amberoid rays fade away

Cold winter wind blows in greyness

Whisps of fog freeze fall trying to escape

The fireplace remains cold and empty

Remnants of your presence chill me

As howls of winds return echoes

Of your last words … before leaving

It happens

Sometimes you fall off

Some proverbial rock

After your mind wakes up

To a world much too different

But I’ll continue to love you

In ways, you never knew

In ways, you never heard

I’ll remember what matters

At least here, in my heart

I’ll admit, I couldn’t be changed

For better or worse, no matter what

Certainly not in the ways you hoped

Just met me feel your heartbeats

Hold me breathless and close

Let’s not say another word

Not before… we let each other go

Tone deaf

I spoke to you

With words from my heart

The way I learned

Love speaks to love

But you just smiled

Then you said goodbye

And I hurt- a long while

Slowly the flame inside- died

Ma days were darker

And time just dragged on

The season muddled into- one

Nothing felt warm or cold

I was still numb, feeling old

Then a voice spoke

Like musical notes

And I turned to see her face

She looked sincere right at me

But her smile changed everything

And since then, every conversation

That she and I’ve shared

Was love speaking to love

In a language only hearts… hear

Learnt

I’ve known dark doubt

I’ve known deep hurt

And when they’ve collided

In the depths of my heart

To echo in hollows of my mind

Where mocking images live forever

Most often as love goes awry

Or when promises implied

Fails to sustain what’s inferred

When only a fool’s uniform

Wears on me but all too well

When I’m left alone in unfamiliar greys

To read between all the blurs

Of you actions verses…your words

Nestled

I bear the scars rented

From misbegotten love

From ten thousand roads

From where I have trodden

By both my body and soul

Where I’ve walked dusty

Where my lips have thirsted

Where I felt unfulfilled hunger

Where I cloaked in only cold

Where my heart was broken

Where the darkness reined

When the sun was unrelenting

Where came the nonstop rain

Where Grace accompanied me

Where I am…for all of my days

Pas toi

It happens unexpectedly

A cruel shiv of reality

Made of bone and flesh

Oft pulls double duty

Slitting your throat

While simultaneously

Stabbing your soul

You’re left speechless

As well as bleeding out

Feeling very abandoned

In like some dark alley

Helpless, almost alone

An unknown shadow flees

Loves mask left… empty

Inevitable

I know I struggled into changes

But I turned around in silence

Broke away from darkness

I bore the tears and scars

Most of which I never earned

And I know you ignored it

Like it never mattered- at all

I’ve made my share of mistakes

Some were hard, some simple

But in all that while

I tried to reach out to you

Over and over and again

Looking for a true connection

Maybe a little understanding

Looking for your point of view

I apologized for your trivialities

Oh, what a shame for both of us

You remained too cynical

And you never really knew me

Honestly, from the inside out

Never understood my passion

Showered me with your doubts

I know I never made it easy

But I always left an opening

Cause my love empathized

My love trusted- in you

It took time to find myself

Tell me, how do I explain

What you’re not hearing

Would any different words

Really change anything- now

You have your harden feelings

Already carved in stone

You’d rather watch me waste away

Than take time to walk along

Oh, what a shame, what a shame

I can’t tell you what I need

Knowing your too good at pretending

You refuse to meet me half away

After all these past years

I know what you think I believe

When it’s so far from reality

So, I just accept, that’s your truth

Oh, what a shame, what a shame

You just can’t do the same

I’ll never make you see, otherwise

All this breaks my heart, breaks my eyes

Oh, what a shame, it must hurt

So, I’ll pay that price all by myself

Tell me it doesn’t matter to you, again

And I’ll remain-unknown…for you

Circles

I don’t believe it was happenstance

That returned the two of us to here

On this day in this moment- staring

So far from where we lost one another

In those past struggling years- broken

My heartbeats always echoes yours

Following our soul’s same yearning

There’s lots of things we could talk about

None of them would erase past doubts

But I don’t care anymore, I need you near

So, I could feel a little bit closer to you

So, I could feel a little bit more like me

Let’s follow the lights that love creates

On a universal pathway lit…back home

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