Storm rider

Photo by Anastasia Shuraeva on Pexels.com

I’m still here- somewhat

With all the broken shards and pieces

Cleaning up messes from faux love

Ones that guilt us into raw submissions

Each time it passes through our hearts

Mostly the dark ones, that allure us in

With their cunning narcissistic words

Dressed seductively as caring accidents

But really spotted us far off as targets

Veiling all those most obvious red flags

Most of the time a new storm often came

Before we finished cleaning up from the last

Or healed from our tender unseen wounds

Or maybe, it twas ones even before that

It seemed as if it was just a changed face

Cause hard as we’ve tried, we didn’t recognize

And some storms tend to linger on for days

Nonetheless, our hearts and us tread onward

In this humanistic journey we call- life

Me: I’m wiser; not living out of a storm cellar

Unarmed, I wear enough scars to be … invincible

Crisscrossing

On occasion, I re-experience

Stepping in steps I’ve tread before

Some of heavy mud, some hard payment

And feel that familiarity be- born

As well as some of old discomforts

As if my shoes in those certain places

Have crudely become too outworn

Nonetheless, I peregrinate onwardly

Pragmatically watching each step carefully

In hopes I quickly leave behind

A trail I have learned and left before

The temptation to remain is too strong

From memories I carry with me, anyways

And live a used-up past for … all my future

Overcome

Setting aside all our childishness 
And those hurt emotions, still left 
Inside raw scars buried in my chest 
From a devastating chaotic erosion 
Of our once shared euphoric heaven 
Protected by some imaginary bubble 
Oh! I have come to realize these days 
That wear on in much different ways 
There is no real guilt to share or wear
No blanketed blame for either to carry 
Such is the nature of adventures taken 
No misleading star we blindly followed 
That stole us away from our own reality 
No winds came to blow us off course 
Albeit we drowned in what was current 
What we shared was beautiful, at first
And far beyond our ability to maintain
We were but simple pyre to that flame 
We got caught in the wild and rampant  
Until we fell into an invisible crevasse  
A fault line- that laid obscure somewhere 
Between where we started, and ended 
A landscape we learned was not… love 

.
Poet of the Light © 2021

Righteous

Crimson- black, blue, and undistinguishable  
Shattered; a scattered casualty of a mess
As if a giant glass kaleidoscope had- burst  
Her fingerprints, clearly all over all of it
That’s how she left my innocent heart
On her immense exit of my love, my life 
Her weapon of choice was whet caustic words
Razor sharp that cut to the bone of my soul
I never would have suspected this cruelness   
And I sat there stunned- alone in a dark corner 
Even my tears had given up on the task of falling 
Like an abandoned child ignoring the obvious
Still, with last fiber and conscious of my being  
My heart craved the best way to … forgive her 

.
Poet of the Light © 2021

Suspension

 
 Tidbits of a Tuscan colored sun
 Adorn the wintry gray horizon
 Beset by a most dividing pall haze   
 As ghostly clouds and wild fog  
 Chase one another in mere silence  
 Providing them rhythm and reason  
 True to life and their own nature  
 I strive to rediscover for myself  
 Since absence of loves presence  
 I’ve transformed into loneliness  
 And became too accustomed to  
 These caustic cold breeze kisses   
 Playing havoc on my numb cheeks                       
 Liken a tall oak tree, overburdened  
 Dew can still seep down my face   
 Transplanted in some remote forest  
 For all the broken, lost or unwanted
 Where few visit or care of recovery
 Caught between life and hibernation
 My frayed heart awaits... rejuvenation
 
 
 Poet of the Light © 2021

Counterbalance

 To live yourself, is to live truth  
 But truth isn’t always accepted
 Much the way dark dislike, light
 I blaze my own path in a silence 
 Perhaps- I’ve outgrown some  
 Of the past- darkness of my life
 Parts I know all too well and yet
 Some I wish I never learned at all
 Far too much beyond my choice 
 But growth can come at a price  
 Often I feel more like a foreigner
 Amongst those I once knew close
 Most of which, in my heart I love  
 Which seem not to know me, now
 So- I find myself in eager search  
 For what exactly, I’m most unsure
 But I’m sure that answers await me
 We’ll meet, in the light … someday
 
 Poet of the Light © 2020

Influential

The empty chair, in sharp silence

I can deal with and compensate for

Glancing stares out a near window

Oft forgetting that, I shouldn’t expect

To see your smiling image out there

My amnesic mistake, calling your name

As I enter a room- that is now barren

Can have a sobering affect to a heart

The painting easel and its blank canvass

Lacking those perfectly placed colors

Of life, you re-imagined so masterfully

By painstaking hands, I can re-imagine

Those are the times I write the utmost

Precious words of my heart, paperlessly

Because they’re spoken without thought

But our bed is the coldest place of all

Not because it lacks your warm body

But because your resounding heartbeats

Is what made all the difference… for me

Music share

Let me hold you…

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=DwSq17kZvyo&feature=share

Fallen

As a child, I danced in make-believe

And always felt reverence for my God

Wandered about as if life was never-ending

I felt all the prismatic colors of life

Tasted heavens golden grains of time

And played in dreams of my imagination

I seen strangeness of snow in summer

Lost my breath in a second of a cold gray dawn

Freely watched the miracle of life, birthed before me

But God knows freedom, is anything but free

Especially when it indiscriminately takes you away

From where and who you really want to be- with

Nothing seems any more terrifying

When you feel, you’ve fallen off the edge

Of the life you once had, with them back then

You leave behind empty whiskey bottles

Instead of dusty footprints for others to follow

Where you’ve been and where you’re going next

Everything changes; and feels so different

You feel the hurt, each time ocean waves break

But you’ve become too numb to feel the wind or rain

Sunshine, no longer matters anymore

Because all its true colors, really came from

People you loved and adored, before it got darker

It ain’t no wonder, so many give up

On both life, unending love and beliefs

When you’re drowning in nothing like it was…back when

Constraints

The sun doesn’t always climb back up

After devastation has thundered through

Ones life like an unceasing wreaking ball

Not at least, at first, in ones frame of mind

And truth be told, it hasn’t been that easy

To dare consider venturing back outwardly

To dare look up into that same skyward

That once umbrella everything- us

Or consign fate still holds something

Hidden within those pattern of stars

Clutched deep in its mysterious galaxy

A pathway, if you will, renewed hope, love

Secretly I’ve watched the stars each night

Even when fog has rolled in like clouds

Endured blinding rainstorms and blizzards

I remained vigilant, with doubts echoing

Awaiting for them to finally realign

To catch me halfheartedly gazing

Yet halfheartedly believing, dreaming

That one night, it steals my breath, my thoughts

Revealing its secret plan, move my soul

Set me upon, the right course to…live love

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