Valorousness

Oh- my dearest poor heart

What have I allowed done you?

What foolishness have I believed

That would leave you- this way?

You’re barely recognizable, even to me

.

To think of all those triumphant times

You were there for me, faithfully

Resounding deep here, in my chest

Providing life to flow so freely

Never restrictive when it mattered most

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Oh- I’ve been a poor caregiver truly

I’ve opened the gates of hell it seems

Not knowing its pending consequence

Not knowing what comes, to devour thee

Like pillagers of life in the darkest night

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I shamelessly fed thee to worldly wolves

When all I wanted was to let you… be loved

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

Antimatter

My whole universe once revolved

Around you and life’s crazy dreams

Now, I’m untouchable by even you

I no longer chase the sun and moon

I learned to tame them, eventually

Now they chase after me… on a leash.

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

Efficacy

I willingly gifted you my true love

But you wanted only obsequiousness

You don’t understand the difference

I really could’ve been- just anyone

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How can you not be moved internally

Beyond that immutable pall of logic

Where divinity and desire simultaneously

Share the ultimate pleasure a heart seeks

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My heart refuses to be enthralled company

Where my body is but a misused yo-yo

Picked up, dangled mercilessly by heartstring

In surfeiting your self indulgent behavior

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Your placebic love makes loneliness a vacation

People like me should remain on…indefinitely

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

Contortionist

I really don’t want you back

I know It would never last, now

Not the way that, you twist words

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But when things got so wrong

What shoulder became so soft

That you could forgot bout me

Like yesterday’s late news story

Evading, all the answers I need

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Tell me true, if you know how

Bout your truths that were lies

And how- how you could twist

Deceive a heart that truly tried

To love you- unconditionally?

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Oh where is that magical place

You go when things don’t erase

From the corners of your mind

And your heart remains broke

As your thirsty soul feels denied?

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How could I have been so utterly blind

Letting to you build a fools fantasy

Inside my colorful mind- so easily

Day after day like a lived a dream

You never planned to ever complete?

,

Tell me, my soul really needs to know

How could you just let my love…go?

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

Dry spells

Is it in the water or something I breath

Something in the air is amiss

The winds of change- just

Don’t blow in my world like they should

It boggles your own heart

That always understood, strange

And I oft find myself

Up on some bluff, overlooking the vast

Carrying an unseen burden pack

Quietly asking myself,

Man- what the hell?

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I wear different- in my life

Like a second skin

And its never about foolish pride

I am, just who I am

Never think twice about helping a friend

But how far does that really go,

When you’re burning life in slow mo,

And being passed by every loss second?

Only to shake your head in confusion

Like drunken cobwebs coming lose

Some late following afternoon after

Whispering echoes, in your mind

Man- what the hell?

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Questions without answer

Trip over the new dawn when it comes

Life seems to be carrying a haze

Changing everything that matters most

Everything- just seems out of sync

Night is morning when you can’t sleep

As the lonely cold feels, all to welcoming

And inner hope starts wearing, doubts

You just know it isn’t right

Sitting alone by the river

waiting for something new to float in

Mumbling to the ripples in the water

This isn’t meant to be my life

And you stumble onward, looking up

Asking with your arms opened wide

Come on, Lord…what the hell?

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

Hybrids

.

Oh ye woman of my dreams that visit me

Like a zephyr only my heart knows

And hides behind a veil of fogginess, hear me

I was taught all of mankind was born with a soul

But, another vision like you has come and spoke

I’ve learned- they were misleading many

They needed humanity not to know- absolute truth

And I accepted and swallowed their lies too

Like a child does it’s mothers milk

Eagerly seeking satisfaction I knew would come, fill me

Oh gluttony even then can still be a sin, unknown

To carry into all of eternities hollow halls alone

Twas most foolish of me, my weak humanism

No spirit resides inside like a hidden shadow

From a divine whisper at my conception called soul

Its vulgar, by design, dear woman, I tell you this

So much make so much sense- now that I know

My deep inner void and bouts of darkness

I could never drown even by spirited rivers

That have plague me like a quagmire since birth

That rage of thunders bolts that spears my heart

Storms of sorrow and insationable hunger

That ghostly thirst, ever present on thine lips

For that I do not have…nor can I ask- for it

I’ve learned now, the secret bounds, cursed some men

To do so, would taint it, taint me for all eternity

I’m alive for purpose not my own to pretend, to mimic

Like those who can fall in love like springs rain drops

To be tested, tempered by invisible fire that burns

A mission assigned, and set forth unknowingly

To be gifted- of that what I do not have

While possessing that which I do have, but cannot gift, as yet

Oh such truths can be bitter tasting I swear, dear woman

Oh Lord- why has thou bequeath me such a burden;

Only to laden me more so by learning- of its truth?

Woman I secretly utter now, I’m one: a treasure chest

Born with a gift of everlasting love inside, for one

But I have no key and cannot release it

Because I have no soul to call love to me

That holds the answer key, in her heart

Unblemished by truth, caring and moved within

A spirit enough of hers for two- humans

And open the chest: me-

By its only designed key…Love

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

I know

.

Oh I’ve been loved- once

Until I was crumbled up

Into sadness and trashed

Left to become swirling dust

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Boy, I know what its like

To learn what love is about

By when its not around

As loneliness breaks your eyes

.

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And I know what its like

To lose faith in your trust

When everyone else does

Because you trust love too much

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I’ve known what its like

To love and still be denied

Get lost inside your mind

Become king to your own dark

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I know just how painfully hard

A skipping heart can beat

When it you trying to breath

Drowning in a shallow sea

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Oh I know what its like

To be kissed by someone

As tender as a summer breeze

Inside your phantom dreams

.

I know what waiting is like

Not to feel seen or seem alive

Wanting to be found, surprised

By understanding pair of eyes

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Every heart needs and knows

Nothings better than being held

Inside warm and tender arms

That doesn’t want to let go

But trust and lets your roam

Knowing you’ll always…come home

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

Jewels

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Oh cynical world-

Where are you heading

What are all these lies

You seem to be telling

To everyone gone blind

But has a heart that still, feels

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I find myself – at odds

Caught between Stoics

And the bleeding reserved

Both encapsulated in a dark

That truly breaks my heart

We have to turn, ourselves around

.

What about Love-

How will it ever grow

If we pull back and hide

For whenever hope- comes

Knocking on our door

But chose not to answer, at all

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How’d we get so far

From where we once were

Mistrusting every strangers

By the clothes they wear

Because of someone else’s crime

Before we’ve heard, a single word

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Befriend- is how it starts

It like a seed, our best chance

When finding our kinship kinds

Just as lost inside temporary time

Like us, in need of a little togetherness

Be a sparkle they find… inside dark silence

.

Poet of the Light © 2020

Inspired in part by a nameless follower~

Acclimating

If only hindsight was more forwardly

Some repetitions, I’ve long tired of

I know it seem cynical by nature

But mainly when it comes to to love

When the relationships grows sour

And they- become bullish cyclopes

Inside my tender hearts china shop

Akin intimate time, pictures memorialized

Our shared memorabilia ends up, broken

And I alone, am left to clean up my pieces

Of my trust, life, dreams and of myself

Remodeling all the unnecessary damage

Changing me, my outlook, circumspection

Just like my last, premature- ever after

Strange how they break it, then blame us

You would’ve thought, people so close

Would be more understanding, in letting go

That the care would’ve easily extended

A kinder, more protective parting of ways

Instead of some prideful Pyrrhic victory

By a lover who’s unveiled as… a stranger

Poet of the Light © 2020