Category: heartache

Hourglass

 The stars I saw in your eyes  
 Was that promising future I desired
 I opened myself to vulnerability  
 Until yours, found someone else's
 And now I feel lost deep inside myself
 As the space between us- grows
 With a louder sound of shattered silence
 I’m watching the grains of my forever
 Slowly fall- out of my daily life  
 Nothing could be more hurting
 Than to watch it all with my own eyes  
 You’re like a comment streaking away
 Without looking back one last time  
 Without so much as a… goodbye
 
 
 Poet of the Light © 2021

Mutuality

 I have a marriage with my scars
 Those seen and unseen publicly  
 We take turns wearing each other
 Like a shared wardrobe of sorts  
 And in this unusual arrangement  
 We also take turns being blessed
 However long those moments… last
 
 
 Poet of the Light © 2021

Suspension

 
 Tidbits of a Tuscan colored sun
 Adorn the wintry gray horizon
 Beset by a most dividing pall haze   
 As ghostly clouds and wild fog  
 Chase one another in mere silence  
 Providing them rhythm and reason  
 True to life and their own nature  
 I strive to rediscover for myself  
 Since absence of loves presence  
 I’ve transformed into loneliness  
 And became too accustomed to  
 These caustic cold breeze kisses   
 Playing havoc on my numb cheeks                       
 Liken a tall oak tree, overburdened  
 Dew can still seep down my face   
 Transplanted in some remote forest  
 For all the broken, lost or unwanted
 Where few visit or care of recovery
 Caught between life and hibernation
 My frayed heart awaits... rejuvenation
 
 
 Poet of the Light © 2021

If-

 If I was worth  
 Quiet evening of simple things
 Wouldn’t you be here  
 Doing just that by now?
 
 If I was worth  
 Your amazing inspiration  
 Wouldn't you be here
 Doing just that by now?
 
 If I was worth  
 Intimate walks along the ocean
 Wouldn’t you be here  
 Doing just that by now?  
 
 If I was worth  
 Time for casual conversation
 Wouldn’t you be here
 Doing just that by now?  
 
 If I was worth  
 A hearty meal laced in laughters  
 Wouldn’t you be here  
 Doing just that by now?  
 
 If I was worth  
 Your unbiased understanding
 Wouldn't you be here
 Doing just that by now?  
 
 If I was worth  
 Your earnest warm embrace
 Wouldn’t you be here  
 Doing just that by now?   

  If I was worth 
  Making mistakes and forgiveness
  Wouldn't you be here
  Doing just that by now?  
 
 If I was worth  
 Anything for you to hold onto  
 Wouldn’t you be here  
 Doing just that by now?  
 
 If I was worth  
 Being loved honestly by you  
 Wouldn't you be here  
 Doing just that by now?  
 
 Where are you… now?  
 
 Poet of the Light © 2020

That one

 She’s a denizen of my soul   
 That distracted train of thoughts
 That echo of my heartbeats
 That whisper that gets me lost
 That wildflower of ethereal aroma  
 That intertwined flesh of comfort  
 That lays with me in quiet dreams
 That queen over all my darkness  
 That gentle voice of sweet serenity
 That reality eluding my grasp
 That seductress of my divine body
 That healer of all my fragile past  
 That keeper of my timelessness  
 That lucid notion of epic beauty
 That welcoming beating heart
 That calls me her only citizen 
 That light guiding my pathway   
 That missing piece of loves presence  
 That home- still left… unfound  
 
 Poet of the Light © 2020

Heartfalls

 The river below has slowed its flow
 Covering its banks at night in fog 
 Geese are passing through 
 Winter must be coming
 The sun has waned in its duty  
 Winds have stopped whining
 Solace is seeking its rest again  
 And you know, I was almost used to  
 Sitting here alone- in my silence
 Recognizing my predicament    
 But like a rogue freight train  
 You- became a loud summer glint  
 As if a lost whisper returning   
 Reflecting, living so wildly free   
 And in that way, you brought me hope
 Oh the mountain trembled, a bit
 I hadn't felt that in such a long while
 It was an unsuspecting rush  
 Flushing through my whole body  
 You were waking the sleepy me up
 From a complicit dream of slumber  
 And you always seemed to know
 Exactly what's on my mind
 In much so- sometimes I wondered  
 If you were just some fragment
 Of myself, lost to a past life   
 Or perhaps, its wandering ghost  
 Trying to tell me something  
 Something, that I may have forgotten  
 Something, I’m yet to discover  
 I have no idea- truth be told  
 What you’re really think or believe   
 You hide now, a shadow, inside your life
 Slowly going further away from me
 Someplace I can’t see or be  
 And now, suddenly somehow
 You’ve become part of the mystery  
 That kept me in this distance
 Just when I'm getting that feeling
 Of wholeness, was still possible
 It seemed I was on the cusp  
 Of learning- a great something
 That’s now getting lost  
 Inside all passing moments  
 While I’ve been pushed down
 From my grand summit of old   
 Left to sit in my silence once again
 Where time alone taught me  
 Between the slides and heartaches  
 Was what I finally came to realize, is   
 We’re just colliding mountainside mirages
 That broke free from our life… for a second  
 
  Poet of the Light © 2020 
  We are crumbling pyrite...

Unsuitable

 They were bright colorful threads  
 Emitting from the core of my soul
 But you strained them all beyond
 Their fraying strength; they broke
 Until they were jumbled fragments  
 To you, they were merely words
 You converted into a big joke
 And my heart, a laughing stock  
 Causing my love to easily loosen 
 That grip of that fabric, you were
 One little simple stitch at a time
 Dragging along, as unwantedness
 In dirt and far behind, your shadow
 Then fallen off and away I stayed  
 Becoming lost from your… forever  
 
 Poet of the Light © 2020

At play

 Beset in a human type of spindrift
 Silent acts of flapping, fleeting caws  
 Dawn gently melts away a rolling fog
 As night temptingly slips off it’s drape
 I feel on my skin the chilly air, breathe
 As my weary mind wanders aimlessly
 To recall all of your missed touches
 Spoken words of love and their hope
We are those children no more, sadly 
 Angelical face of such sweet promise
Gone now, there- beyond that great pall  
 Shivers race feverishly through my soul  
 And I further wonder again to myself;
 Would you return, if you really could,
 To me, my heart, my arms as it once was,  
 Or would you remain- my lost forever?
 Oh how my tears even fear your thoughts
 And reluctantly fall- away from me too
 Now only my shattered dark emotions
 Will share their seasons… without you
 
Poet of the Light © 2020

Heartland

 I’ve been down this road a time or two before
 Between the shadows of death and life itself  
 Feeling that breeze of absence, push against me
 Like some nefarious ghost trying to sabotage hope
 Slowing my approach, that's heading off to unknowns 
  Stepping back in muddy tracks, I’ve laid previously
 Before falling off that deceptive precipitous cliff  
 Yet, once again in an earnest and blinded effort  
 Compelled to chase behind the same sun and moon  
 Like some shared, dutiful shadow, in search of
 What hasn’t been found in a wayfarers clock face
 That own but a limited life's without a restart  
 A place never known nor seen before in this life
 Yet, calls to an embedded fire in his heart  
 That's lays beyond the pall of human perception 
 Where mind, body and soul are elucidated, as one
 Erasing all scars and pain of every operose step
 Replacing failed loves, broke and shattered 
 To reach and live- in love's … welcomed arms
  
 Poet of the Light © 2020